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Growth and Learning: the 8th stage of experience.

Once we have addressed our imbalance we by engaging with the environment we return once more to ourselves, but we are not quite the same.

We are different: perhaps very slightly, perhaps in a major way.

If we had a drink to satisfy our thirst then the difference may be slight. If we have developed a new relationship or explored a different religion or investigated a new philosophy then the difference may be profound.

The final stage of our experience is some form of integration or assimilation – we are somehow different: we have grown in some way or learned something.

We are different as a result of our experience.

This stage will usually take time. It can take a while for ‘something to sink in’. We may not realise how significant something has been for us. For me, a number of times a stray remark by a friend has ‘hit me between the eyes’ and I’ve needed to sit down and think through what it meant for me.

This means having time in our lives to just sit and be with what has happened in our lives.

To let things settle and just be idle for a while. Needless to say we are encouraged to be just the opposite (busy, productive, striving). This is the wisdom of having a day of rest each week, and times for holidays each year. And ideally a time of quiet each day.

This stage ends when we feel like we have assimilated the new experience and we can rest.

And then the experience cycle starts once more.

The other articles in this series are:

Rest: Eight Stages of Experience #1

Rest Disturbed: The Eight Stages of Experience#2 

Looking Around: Eight Stages of Experience #3

Focussing: Eight Stages of Experience #4

Beginning to Act: Eight Stages of Experience #5

Engagement: Eight Stages of Experience #6

Satisfied? Eight Stages of Experience #7


I'm Evan Hadkins. To find out how to live a more satisfying life you can download my manifesto on living authentically. It is a book of exercises to guide you to finding, nourishing and living from the core of who you are.

If you would like me to write about some aspect of living an authentic life please don't hesitate to get in touch. There is a box in the sidebar where you can leave a question anonymously if you wish, or you can email me, use the contact page, or comment on this post.

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{ 5 comments… add one }
  • ming 2007/11/09, 6:29 pm

    hi, i read your comments in TS, and, now you have 1 addition to your traffic:)

  • Evan Hadkins 2007/11/09, 8:54 pm

    Thanks Ming,


    All comments welcome. If you want me to write on anything in particular let me know and I’ll try to oblige. If not I’ll try to refer you to somewhere useful.

    Thanks again.

  • Dewi 2007/11/13, 12:19 pm

    hi.Im copy your rss site

  • Evan Hadkins 2007/11/13, 12:26 pm



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