In this part I want to write about how we think about things. The last part was about our perceptions (what we think about) and how to change them. This part is the difference we can make in how we think about things.
In our western culture it seems to me that thinking it extraordinarily overvalued. Our schooling systems are based on the delusion that if people are given the correct information then all will be right with the individual and the world. [If it were this easy we’d be living in paradise by now.]
This has often lead, in self development and other places, to an attack on thinking about (linear rationality). I think it is possible to agree with most of these attacks. Thinking is not feeling – and someone who can’t feel is a sad person likely to have rotten relationships. Thinking about is not experiencing – it does not have the vividness and succulence of our primary experience. Someone who thinks about instead of experiencing will be half-dead. Thinking about is without values – we can analyse and efficiently construct a nuclear bomb just as easily as a way of living sustainably on our planet. For me these criticisms are important and true.
And I want to say that thinking is a valuable part of human possibility. Our ability to analyse, experiment and solve problems means we can live lives of greater ease. Our ability to anticipate means that we can anticipate difficulties and prepare for them. (We can purchase in advance the ingredients for a meal.)
The Use of Thinking About Our Experience: short cuts and feelings
One big advantage of thinking about our experience is that it can save us time and energy. People who are good at engineering and mathematics tell me that the biggest part of solving the problems in their field is recognising what kind of problem it is. Once the kind of problem is recognised then there is a wealth of wisdom already available that can be applied in a fairly routine way. Once the type of problem is recognised there is no need to come up with an entirely custom-made solution – there are all kinds of ready-made solutions that may need to be adapted but that are there to be drawn on.
Self-development, like mathematics and engineering, has its wisdom to be drawn – depending on the kind of problem that is to be solved.
And sometimes this isn’t obvious. Imagine a tennis player coming to a life coach wanting to win at tennis. The coach teaches them to visualise their tennis strokes and the player goes on to win many a match. Later it emerges that this player actually hated playing tennis. There are fairly routine ways to help someone figure out what they don’t like and do like (imagining perfect days, finding where they lose a sense of time, analysis of past experience and so on) as well as improve their performance (visualisation, habituation and so on).
In self development, there are hundreds of methods and routines that have been developed. Whatever part of your life you wish to address, there are ways that have been developed to do this. But this requires you, from thinking about your experience, coming up with some kind of formulation of what your problem is or the area you wish to be addressed. This is the first advantage of thinking about our experience – accessing available wisdom and so saving ourselves unnecessary time and effort.
The second advantage of thinking about our experience is changing our satisfaction with what we have done. Imagine this therapy session between a therapist and client:
Therapist: You look a bit sad or something.
Client: Um, yeah.
T: Why’s that?
C: Yesterday I really just wasted my time. I didn’t really achieve anything – you know?
T: What did you do?
C: Oh. Read a book, went for a swim, chatted to friends, that kind of stuff. Stuff that I like, but not achieving a whole lot.
T: So, yesterday you organised your life in a way that you did what you enjoyed all day?
C: Hey, that’s right. Thank you! (smiles)
This client’s satisfaction changed because they changed the way they thought about their day: from using achievement to enjoyment as the measure.
The way we think about our experience can contribute in important ways to how much we enjoy our lives.
Related posts:
- The Rough Guide to Self Development Part Two Our Experience and Our Thinking
- The Rough Guide to Self Development Part Three Changing How We “See” Things
- The Rough Guide to Self-Development Part One Introduction
- Psychotherapy: a brief guide to what it is.
- "Don't Stop Thinking About Tomorrow"?
Tags: thinking
